Sunday, August 30, 2009

Can't Believe the Time

I can't believe I haven't written in so long. I was so into trying to write and of course, never follow through. It just seems to be my motto...I have all the intensions, but those intensions can't write a blog.

I've had a lot of ups and downs this year...mostly downs...mostly financial and a lot of work disappointments. I decided to just use what I have and make it work until I can come up with something better. I don't like the way things are right now and I believe that greater things will come...and that will happen only if I can make that change. It won't change for me...

Another big thing I'm planning on working on is my weight...this trip to Florida has been the biggest eye opener of all. I realized that I love to be active...but it's pretty hard to do that when your body can't function the way you want it to...and those rides...they don't come in XXL and that's not fun and exciting at all. I'm planning on doing a video blog and posting it on youtube. Now, if you know me...this is the most horrific thing I could do for myself...post MYSELF up on this site where everyone can see me and perhaps say things that will most likely drive me to drink...I can't even look at myself in pictures, let alone watch myself in a video blog...but I'm still working that out...its not written in stone just yet. I just want to be able to prove that I can do it and help anyone else along the way with their feelings. The worst feeling to have is to feel like you're all alone in a battle so great.

Writing: that's something else too. I'm going to force myself to write. There's so many great stories I want to tell...and who knows...maybe I can even sell something. To make money from a hobby would be a dream come true.

Well, I'm off to think of what I'm going to do...to change me...to improve me...make myself healthy and look good while doing it!

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